Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Housebandian Rhapsody


Is this just my life?
It's sure no fantasy
Caught in a timeslip
Of such endless banality
Open my eyes
And try to smell fresh coffee
I'm just a Houseband
Getting no sympathy
Because I'm "get this Dad", "take me here"
"where's my socks?" need a beer
Every day the same shit
Doesn't really matter to me, to me

Mama just ate some ham
Put some eggs upon her plate
Picked her fork up and she ate
Mama, breakfast just begun
And now you've gone and ate it all away
Mama, ooh
Didn't mean to make them fried
If they're not poached just right this time tomorrow
Have them boiled, have them boiled, it doesn't really matter

We're late, school bell has rung
Putting washing on the line
Body's aching all the time
Goodbye lazy mornings
I've got to sweep
Gotta find those dust bunnies and old cobwebs
Dusting, oooooooh (Every way the wind blows)
I just don't know why?
Sometimes wish I'd never cleaned up at all

[Air Guitar Solo]

I hear a moody teenage girl upon the stairs
Hair goes Whoosh. Hair goes Whoosh. Lost in a cloud of perfume
Purple nails and scrunchy, very, very trendy indeed
Where's my trainers? Where's my trainers? Where's my trainers and my coat?
Oh here we go-o-o-o-o
I'm just a young girl nobody loves me
She's just a young girl from a Twitter family
Sparing her nails from this monstrosity

Party please, ends at 12, will you let me go?
You're joking? No, we will not let you go
Let her go
You're joking? We will not let you go
Let her go
You're joking? We will not let you go
Let me go (Will not let you go)
Let me go (Will not let you go) (Never, never, never, never)
Let me go, o, o, o, o
No, no, no, no, no, no, no

Put that down Mate. Put that down Mate. Put it down before it burns
The A&E has a gurney put aside for thee, for thee, for thee

So you think that these spuds will just peel themselves
So you think that your clothes just appear on your shelves
Oh, children, can't do this to me, children
Just gotta get out, just gotta get right outta here

[Air Guitar Solo]
(Oooh yeah, Oooh yeah)

I do all the hard work
For a lousy fee
I do all the hard work
I do all the hard work for free

I deserve a beer now...

13 comments:

Cate P said...

You are the champion, my friend
You must keep writing til the end
You are the champion
of all the housebands
No time for hoovers
coz you must keep writing
til the end.

Loved it loads :)

Inshin said...

You guys always release a single just leading up to Christmas !!

Brilliant

Brit in Bosnia / Fraught Mummy said...

The show must go on.

Loved it, made me giggle a lot.

The Dotterel said...

Or two. I'd buy you one if you were here... quite brilliant. Can we expect a YouTube performance in the near future?

Catharine Withenay said...

Fantastic! Put a great big smile on my face!

Russ said...

Go get yourself a beer!

Angela Montague said...

Brilliant. You nailed it, Scaramouche.

And

Do you do the Fandango?

nik_kee_dee said...

Love it. Very funny =)

@nkd x

Geriatric Mummy said...

love it, love it, love it :D

Heather said...

too much time on ones hands, perhaps?

Excellently done.

The Mommy Daddy said...

If I had a record company I'd sign you up.

muummmmeeeeee...... said...

Love the lyrics and will be humming the tune for the rest of the day...

Insomniac Mummy said...

Bloody brilliant!

:D