Is this Gooner a Goner?

I’ve been a Gooner (an Arsenal fan to the uninitiated, who will stop reading right about….now) since I was seven.  My Dad was a rugby fan with no ties to any particular football team, so whilst I played football morning, noon and night, I didn’t support any one team.  I admired the Liverpool team of the seventies, who didn’t, but it didn’t even occur to me to become a glory hunter and start supporting them.  My granddad collected the football cards that came in his packet of smokes and gave them to me – and I collected my Panini football stickers with more allegiance to filling empty spaces in my sticker book than to the teams they represented.

I was born in Barking which is a mere pass, dribble and shoot away from Upton Park, the home of West Ham United.  But even at seven I knew they called themselves ‘the Irons’ and I also knew that Iron in Cockney meant poof, so that was a non-starter.  So I just carried along in my own merry little way, playing football for the school, the street, the gang - whoever would let me to be honest (and when that was no-one then it was me versus the wall).

Then came the day that would change my life forever, for better or worse I know not, just changed.  That day was Saturday 6^th May 1978 - FA Cup Final day – Ipswich v Arsenal.

We had gone to a Cup Final party at friends of my Mums, I remember they lived in Upminster and that they had a daughter called Sarah but I remember nothing more unless it was footy related.  The whole house seemed to be supporting Ipswich, I guess that’s because they were considered the underdog at the time and me being the contrary bugger that I was back then (and possibly still am), I decided I would get behind the Arsenal.

I couldn’t tell you too much about the game – I remember being spell bound by Liam Brady running down the wing and when they substituted him mid way through the second half, I swore I saw tears in his eyes and that was it - I was officially a Gooner.  Incidentally I met him years later in the hospitality lounge at the 2003 Cup Final and as I nervously collected his autograph like the seven year old I had become, I rather gushingly told him he was the reason I had become an Arsenal fan.

Anyway, I digress, Arsenal ended up losing that game 1-0, but that didn’t matter - I was hooked and I was a Gooner, and nothing was ever going to change that.

I got lucky as a fan, many have to wait years to see their team lift any silverware but I had to wait precisely a year and six days, for on 12^th May 1979 Arsenal were back at Wembley, this time against a team that would become a thorn in my backside – Man Utd (further referred to as “Manure”).  I don’t know if it’s the romanticism of looking back through age tinted glasses, but that was probably the greatest Cup Final I have ever seen.  The sun was shining, we were two up by half time, but with ten minutes to go we were starting to look very tired.  Then came the Manure fight back and within five minutes and with less than five to go, they had brought it back to 2-2.  Even I could see that there was no way our boys would last another 30 minutes of extra time, we were doomed.

Luckily for me, Brady thought otherwise.  In the final minute he shrugged off two challenges and passed outside to Graham Rix.  Rix crosses over and up pops Alan Sunderland to head in the winner.  I went mad and ran around the front room screaming my head off (even writing this now has given me goose bumps). 

After that it was slim pickings for a while, a Cup Final defeat to West Ham the following year, a League Cup win against Liverpool in ’87 (thanks to Charlie ‘Champagne’ Nicholas), but it was mostly a lot of dour football.  I had started going to the matches with my mates by then, part of the North Bank faithful and by now Arsenal had become my religion.

I was lucky enough to have seen some of the great Arsenal legends – Henry, O’Leary, Rocastle, Wright, Vierra, Bergkamp and Adams (AKA God).  I’ve also been lucky enough to watch players who would bleed red and white, players like Groves, Parlour (AKA the Romford Pele), Davis, Keown, Bould, Dixon and Winterburn.  Neither of those lists is exhaustive, but I could go on for hours without even getting to Limpar, Ljungberg and Lukic.  The trouble is, that’s all in the past - if you cut our current crop of players they will bleed pound notes and then sue you for breach of contract.

I think my love affair with all things Arsenal is coming to an end.

I think it all started with Cashley Hole (AKA Mr Cheryl Cole) and his “I nearly swerved off the road” comment re his proposed wage increase to a mere £55K a WEEK, five grand less than he wanted, and it’s all gone downhill since then.  Sure we are playing some of the best football I have ever seen (well we were ‘till this season) and we are always there or thereabouts when it comes to the League title, but I’m used to investing time and loyalty to these players but they don’t seem to want to pay it back anymore.

Sure, maybe it’s because I’m getting older and more cynical now - I’m thirty-ten now and not as naïve as I once was – and maybe I haven’t got as much time to spare watching football, the kids want to go out and play it after all, but surely we as fans deserve some degree of loyalty from these overpaid mercenaries?

It was only when my 17 year old daughter texted me Sunday afternoon to check on the score because she was nowhere near a TV, that I realised that instead of watching the game I was out in the garage cleaning up (jeez you may as well pass me the pipe and slippers).  I haven’t watched a whole game this season and come to think of it, I can’t really recall watching many at all this year.  It looks like I’ve been a Gooner in name only for a while and I’m not sure how much that bothers me?

Would the Gooner in me today be able to write this piece here again http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/28/opinion/28iht-edharding.html?ref=global ?  I somehow doubt it, the passion has gone, but do I blame the team or my age?  I want to be a hard-core fan again but what’s the point when the players leave as soon as some rich club show them a flash of knickers and a garter belt stuffed with cash?  I’ve realised that as you get older, the amount of hurt in your life increases exponentially and I’m not sure that I want to add the pain of losing games, or players to it.

So I don’t know where that leaves me.

When I started writing this piece, I had come to think of myself as someone who, from now on, would just keep an eye on the results with a smile or a frown.  But the writing of this and the watching of old goals on YouTube has made me somehow doubt that that would be possible.  I still shed a tear when I watch old clips of Rocastle play and I guess that will never change.

Arsenal, I’m giving you one more chance.  One more chance to inspire me, to make me shout, to make me sing, to make me cry.  One more chance I tell you.

But who am I kidding?

Rio

This is a sponsored post brought to you by the makers of Rio.  Not Rio the place as that would be God (or Darwin, I get confused), but Rio the animated film (you know, those Ice Age Creators). 

Last week Kaede and I were lucky enough to be invited to a screening of Rio at London Zoo.  Even luckier was the fact that the event was held in a function room within the Zoo and not the monkey enclosure, where the Mrs rather cruelly implied I would be more at home.

They had provided food (which Kaede had four plates of), drink (of which Kaede consumed three toilet stops worth) and cuddly toy characters (of which Kaede snagged two somehow).  After the screening one of the zoo keepers brought out a real Macaw, which created such a huddle of excited kids that I’m surprised they managed to get out alive.

Kaede absolutely loved the film and even though she had already seen it at the cinema, she still sat there riveted, only moving to dance along with great samba soundtrack.  From an adults point of view it was a fun watch, which is a good job as I’m sure this will be one that the kids make me watch over and over.

All this was to launch the release of the Rio DVD and Blu-Ray on the 24th October.  It comes with more extras than you can shake a stick at, including bonus Angry Bird levels.  Angry Birds is the app that Kaede is always nicking my phone or tablet to play, so some extra levels to keep her quiet on the trains are more than welcome.

Whilst I haven’t got any copies of the DVD to give away, I do have some links to some cool free stuff:

For some computer cursors (I’m currently using Luis) click here http://www.premierpr-online.co.uk/rio/

For a Birds v Monkeys game click here http://www.birds-vs-monkeys.co.uk/

For a Rio In-a-Row game click here http://www.rio-in-a-row.co.uk/

So if you’re anything like me and the thought of the kids home for the half-term week is filling you with dread, you can’t go far wrong with a copy of Rio and maybe a bag of popcorn to keep them occupied.

Making Meccano

Quite often as you start to approach middling life, you look back with fondness at how much better things were in days of yore.  The music, the sense of society, the dress sense of teenagers and the size of a curly wurly.  But one thing that has improved with age is Meccano.  I have vague recollections of yellow bits of metal that could be bolted together to make something, that whilst looked harmless, made an excellent weapon for smacking my brother over the head with, but that is nothing compared to what they’re making now.

A few weeks ago, the lovely people at Meccano sent me a couple of their new kits for me and my six year old to try out and boy was I shocked.  Pack one was a Space Chaos DarkPirates Spaceship, all bells and whistles with light and sound effects.  Pack two was a Turbo Radio Control car and this was the one I was looking forward to making the most. 

Both packs were aimed at the 7-14 year old age groups and although Kaede is only 6, I figured something that really made her think would last a lot longer than something she could put together in 10 minutes (plus it would mean that she would need my help, whoop whoop).

The two boxes sat on my kitchen table for two frustrating weeks due to weekend activities, illnesses and sheer bad timing.  Meccano had always seemed like a rainy day toy and unfortunately we were having a crazy Indian summer with temps up to 29C.  Every time I walked past the boxes I could hear an ethereal voice calling “Come to me…play with me…don’t wait for the kids”.  Eventually I had to ask the wife to hide them away lest I succumb to temptation like an Essex girl outside Lakeside.

Eventually I snapped and one sunny Sunday afternoon, Kaede and I sat down and opened up the spaceship pack.  One look at all the parts and nuts and bolts, and Kaede was hooked.  As I read through the instruction manual, Kaede organised all the parts into their own separate places (a lesson she learnt from watching me attempt to put together all things IKEA).  The instructions were in a simple step by step guide, with every step listing what pieces were needed for that particular moment. Kaede took responsibility for gathering the pieces together before each step, each time with the furrowed brow of someone bearing the great responsibility of a major engineering project.  A really clever idea is that the front of the booklet had a printed ruler, so that when it said a 5.4mm bolt was needed, it was easy for her to pick out the right one. 

With heads buried deep into our project, we ignored the world and only paused to sup from our worker drinks (lager for me, a weak shandy for her).  You really started to feel the sense of excitement coming from her as the spaceship started to take shape and I was pleasantly surprised that she stuck with it from beginning to end.  Our Kaede is a bit of a feral one and not well known for sitting in one place for too long, but the Meccano had really grabbed and drawn her in.

With a flurry of activity and a gasp of relief (or disbelief) we finished and Kaede proudly held up the finished article.  Not only did it not fall to bits when she did that, but it also started making sound effects and the engines started to glow red.  Kaede then spent the next hour running around the garden with it, dive bombing her brother from behind - I guess some sibling things never change.

That night the spaceship had pride of place in her bed and it has slept there ever since.  The weather report said it will be raining next weekend and there’s a long winter ahead of us, so it looks like my, I mean her, radio controlled car will be next on the agenda.  I’m not sure who’s looking forward to it more.

Many thanks to the good people at Meccano for not only making the stuff, but for sending me the free samples as well.  The Space Chaos spaceship retails at £24.99 and the Turbo RC Racing car at £29.99

Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner

I have an admission - I’ve been ignoring my relationship of late.  I pay no attention to her, I take her for granted.  I know she will always be there, so I ignore everything she has to offer.  Do you know what, sometimes I’ve been known to litter her, unforgivable I know.  For all this I want to make a public apology.

I’m sorry London, I had forgotten how beautiful you are.  I had forgotten how many interesting nooks and crannies you had.  I had forgotten how much of you remained un-explored to me and for that I humbly apologise.  You may wonder what brought on this ‘road to Damascus’ moment, what seismic event could have occurred?  Well, it turns out that seeing London from 135 meters was enough to do it.

I received an email the other week asking if I would like to go on a Champagne Experience on the London Eye, followed by a London Eye River Cruise down the Thames.  The first words that jumped out at me were FREE, CHAMPAGNE and A BREAK FROM THE CHILDREN, so I obviously accepted (as you knew I would) and on Saturday the Mrs and I took the (sometimes) short journey from East to Central London.

We had picked a beautiful day for it, the sun was shining and the air had that crispness to it that makes September the best month of the year (the fact the kids go back to school in September is pure coincidence).  It doesn’t take long to get from my neck of the woods to Westminster, so before we knew it we were standing at the foot of the wheel and craning our necks upwards at the tallest Ferris wheel in the Western hemisphere.

We went inside to pick up our complimentary tickets and as we were early we popped into the new 4D experience that comes as part of package.  I won’t spoil the surprise too much, but it’s a short 3D film with added wind, bubbles and mist effects, which was freaky if not enjoyable.

Ten minutes before our allotted time we went to the meeting area and were promptly walked over to the Priority queue, all the while trying not to look too smugly at the queuing tourists.  Each capsule holds 25 people, but with the Champagne Experience our group of 20 was split into two pods of 10.  This gave us all plenty of room to wander around and enjoy the view, and OH MY GOD what a view.

It takes fifteen minutes to get to the very top, but I guarantee your first WOW will be uttered within five.  The view down the river to Tower Bridge is spectacular enough, the view of St James Park and Buckingham Palace is awe inducing and seeing the Houses of Parliament and Big Ben from above is superlative inducing.  Then just when you think it can’t get any better, somebody puts a glass of champagne in your hands. 

It was at that moment that I decided to start playing the lottery again as I don’t want to experience anything else in life without holding a glass of champagne.  At the Post Office getting your Car Tax – have a glass of Champers Sir.  Standing in the ‘Ten items or less’ aisle in Sainsbury’s – here are your bubbles Sir.  Watching a never-ending School play – Champagne would be lovely please Headmaster.  Oh yes, that will be the life for me.

Our lovely host in the capsule was called Joy and she did an excellent job.  She was always on hand to take pictures for you or point out some of the sights.  It was once I stopped looking at all the obvious monuments and buildings that I realised how much of London I hadn’t seen and how much it had to offer.  Standing on top of the world over-seeing our beautiful city, I felt a sense of pride that I hadn’t felt since my daughter accidentally-on-purpose tripped up the school bully and got away with it.  All too soon our ride was over, but then we hopped straight on the boat for the cruise down the Thames.

So we proceeded to view London from a lower, but no less interesting, perspective.  As soon as the Tour Guide got on the microphone I knew we were in for a treat.  He sounded like Hugh Grant at his funniest (think About a Boy rather than Nine Months) and his spiel was part factual, part comedy routine.  For example –

“Big Ben is actually named after Sir Benjamin Hall who oversaw the installation.  Thank goodness his name wasn’t Richard.  Or William.”

And

“The Bloody Tower achieved its nickname due to the bloody murders that occurred there, including the rather bloody murder of the two young princes.  You can’t see the Bloody Tower that well because of all the bloody trees.”

He managed to keep this patter going for the entire 45 minutes of the cruise and it certainly added to the experience.  The trip took us past Westminster Palace to Lambeth Bridge, there it turned around and took us down to Tower Bridge, then another U-turn that brought us back to the London Eye.  It was a most relaxing way to view the Thames and loads preferable to the way I normally see it – running down the South Bank after the kids.

It was a great day out and it re-ignited my love affair with London.  I’m not saying where you live is bad and I’m not saying your town or city is in some way inferior.  All I’m saying is that London Rocks and there are a thousand good reasons why it’s still the hub of the country.  I’m a Londoner through and through and proud of it, I’m just sorry I forgot it for a while.

Many thanks to Alison from Hill & Knowlton for the tickets, they were very much appreciated.